The magazine’s Ethicist columnist on the obligations faced by those who choose not to be vaccinated against Covid-19.
I run a small group at a college that requires Covid-19 vaccination for students. One student in my group received a religious exemption. I want to start having in-person meetings and functions, but not everyone is comfortable gathering in a room with an unvaccinated person. Even though the risk is small to any one of us because we are vaccinated, some of us have family members who are unable to be vaccinated at the present time. Having an unvaccinated member within the group carries a risk that one of us could become infected and infect an immune-compromised person or otherwise vulnerable family member.
Group functions and meetings are vital to my students and especially to new members. They promote learning and exchange of ideas vital to our projects, and social and work-related interactions are important for our work and for team building. Before Covid-19, we would order food and discuss work-related issues and other topics. The Zoom meetings we’ve been having are not a great substitute for this. How can we have group functions and not exclude an unvaccinated person? Should we suggest that the person participate via Zoom? Name Withheld
People are free to refuse vaccination for religious reasons, but they may have to deal with the consequences. The fact that most students in your group have been vaccinated substantially lowers their risk of contracting the virus and then infecting other, vulnerable people, but of course not to zero.
The C.D.C. currently uses red (least safe), yellow (less safe) and green (safest) scoring to indicate safety when vaccinated and unvaccinated people mingle. There are certainly ways of accommodating this unvaccinated student that would secure a fully green score for all participants — meetings with masks and social distancing and without food; or meeting only outside. But such measures would pose a serious burden. They would impede the easy, free-form interactions that contribute to the group’s functioning. The unvaccinated student who wishes to be included in these interactions, meanwhile, gains nothing when they are eliminated for everyone.
The members of your group could reasonably agree to gather in a room with an unvaccinated person who was properly masked and distanced. (Note that it’s the unvaccinated person who is chiefly at risk, earning a C.D.C. “yellow” even when those precautions are taken.) Otherwise, the student could indeed participate via Zoom. This arrangement is far from ideal. The student will not get all the benefits that other members will. But disallowing this student from pre-pandemic-style in-person sessions where everyone, including the student, is unmasked and undistanced wouldn’t represent hostility toward the student or his faith community. It would merely represent C.D.C.-guided vigilance.
For years I have employed a lovely young woman to clean my home. She also works for several of my friends who, like me, are elderly with various infirmities. For five months, at the height of the pandemic, I asked her not to come to work but paid her nevertheless. Now she says that she does not plan to be vaccinated as she doesn’t think she needs to be. I said that I might ask her to stop coming when it is cold outside and I cannot leave my home while she is here. I told her that I would be unable to pay her in that event. I believe this would be her choice. She appeared upset but did not say she would reconsider. If she later tells me that she has been vaccinated, would it be ethical for me to ask to see her vaccination card? Name Withheld
Asking her for evidence of vaccination means you don’t take her at her word. That reflects, of course, the strained nature of your relationship. But she either doesn’t recognize that her vaccination status matters to you and her other elderly clients or is reluctant to be vaccinated for reasons that go beyond doubting that “she needs to.” Otherwise she would have volunteered to be vaccinated once you voiced your concerns. In paying her not to work for five months, you’ve properly shown consideration for the exigencies of people in her position. But there are exigencies for people in your position, too.
Once again, it’s up to her whether she chooses to forgo vaccination, but it’s also up to her to deal with the consequences. She may prefer not to; she may think that lying about her vaccination status is justified because it’s not your business. But it is. And if asking for evidence of vaccination will secure your peace of mind, you’re entitled to do so.
I recently discovered that my sister lied to our elderly parents about being vaccinated for Covid-19. She has no plans to get vaccinated and told them she had done so only to allay their anxieties. Of all my siblings, she has the most direct contact with our parents.
I am not close with her and was stunned when, in a rare conversation, she divulged what she’d done. Our parents have been diligent about masking, distancing and getting vaccinated. When they believed she’d been vaccinated, they allowed her back into their home, unmasked. They are now making summer vacation plans that include her and involve staying together. My sister’s omission has put me in an awkward position. Covid-19 is a dangerous and deadly disease, especially for people over 60. The vaccines are not 100 percent effective. Our parents have a right to know the vaccination status of those with whom they spend time indoors, unmasked.
What’s the best way for me to approach this? Should I insist my sister tell them the truth and give her a small time frame to do so, before I tell them myself? Name Withheld
It sounds as if your sister, too, has neglected to consider how her decision affects others — unless, of course, she simply doesn’t care. Your parents, given their age, have an increased risk of “breakthrough infections,” and they have let their guard down with your sister because she lied to them. Call your parents now. The only call you should consider making before you do is to your sister, telling her what you’re doing and why.
I live in an apartment, and my next-door neighbor recently died of Covid-19. We shared a patio area with him for five years, and he was friendly when we ran into each other, which wasn’t very often. Most of the time, he was at his partner’s house across town. I found out that my neighbor had died when his children started coming in and out of the apartment. They seemed not very emotional, more focused on divvying up his belongings.
I later found out from the partner that she had been removed from the hospital visitation list by the children and wasn’t allowed to say goodbye during his last days. She asked my husband and me to write a letter verifying their relationship, to use as legal evidence of their domestic partnership. She would like to win back the apartment and possibly some belongings.
I didn’t know much about her or the history of her relationship with our neighbor. I don’t doubt they were committed to each other, but I’m not sure we are the best people to write letters of support. She has been spending time in the apartment, and we hear her crying loudly. Should we write the letter or stay out of it? Name Withheld
I assume you think your neighbor would have wanted some of his possessions to go to his partner, even though he plainly failed to document those intentions. If they were a couple, especially a longstanding one, she has a moral claim to some of the property they shared; a court can decide whether she has a legal one too. Because you seem to have relevant evidence, it would be a good thing to provide it.
But you have a duty to say only what you are confident of. You may not ornament the truth in order to advance her interests, however much you disapprove of these children. In the meantime, you might spread the word to friends and acquaintances about the merits of having an up-to-date will.
Kwame Anthony Appiah teaches philosophy at N.Y.U. His books include “Cosmopolitanism,” “The Honor Code” and “The Lies That Bind: Rethinking Identity.” To submit a query: Send an email to ethicist@nytimes.com; or send mail to The Ethicist, The New York Times Magazine, 620 Eighth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10018. (Include a daytime phone number.)
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