Alabama: 5
Alaska: Leaning 4
Arizona: T.B.D.
Arkansas: 3-something
California: 4.000001
Colorado: About 4?
Connecticut: $4.4 billion
Delaware: Ordinary 4
Florida: Commonsense 5
Georgia: 11,476 to go
Hawaii: 4-point-oh
Idaho: .40 cal.
Illinois: Make offer.
Indiana: Ask again later.
Iowa: 2,024
Kansas: 4 / not 4
Kentucky: Nonnegotiable 5
Louisiana: Boo-coo 3
Maine: 5 but looking
Maryland: 4 and holding
Massachusetts: As 4 as it gets
Michigan: Crossed-out-tattoo 4
Minnesota: 4, if that’s O.K.?
Mississippi: 6 and falling
Missouri: 3, 4, or 5—give or take
Montana: At least 5
Nebraska: 5-ish 4
Nevada: 3, and the over
New Hampshire: 4 for now
New Jersey: 5, and the under
New Mexico: 5, please
New York: “5?” Please.
North Carolina: Turning 4
North Dakota: 5 below
Ohio: The 4 that is a 5
Oklahoma: Never 4
Oregon: 3.999999
Pennsylvania: “n” = the Unknown
Rhode Island: Fried calamari!
South Carolina: Future 4
South Dakota: Tentative 7
Tennessee: Trending 3
Texas: 5 lone stars
Utah: Computers down
Vermont: Nonnegotiable 4
Virginia: 4, né 5
Washington: Fine with 4
West Virginia: Damn sure 6
Wisconsin: Conflicted 4
Wyoming: 4 the hard way ♦
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